Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Newly-wed Bliss?

I don't pretend to be on expert on marital relationships but here's what I've learnt so far:

One thing I've realized early on in my marriage is the need to reaffirm my commitment to my husband... every day! The spiritual aspect to marriage is rather helpful in this regard. It's easy to be mean and selfish especially when one is feeling neglected or lonely, resentful or "used" but, at the end of the day if I can go to sleep with a clear conscience, it's well worth the effort. When situations become... *ahem* challenging and I'm yearning for home comforts, it helps to remember that God is always with me and ultimately, I am in control of my happiness... no one can change who I am and it's my choice to be happy or to be miserable.

As trivial as it may sound, dear husband and I come from completely different backgrounds... Case in point: I love Akon; Mr. F listens to :)
But, I'm not going to give up listening to Akon or expect him to listen to him for my sake... I like some me time, when I can be care-free, young Gaia and not be a married aunty.

It also helps to remember and praise the good qualities and ignore the annoying habits of the spouse... after all, he probably ignores a bunch of annoying habits that I have (like scraping his car every now and then and having my hair stuck in the carpet... gross, I know :-P)

Take care of your health. When you're working, traveling, doing the groceries and laundry and testing your emotional boundaries each day, it's easy to succumb to tummy aches and headaches and influenza... A strong immune system and a bit of energy and vitality can work wonders and help you get through the day.
(P.S. Mommy dearest is no longer there to cajole you into taking your medicine and bring you warm milk in bed...)

In an argument, hold your peace... Silence and a hurt look is often as effective as loud, angry words (sometimes, even more) and you'll have the added satisfaction of having kept your dignity. Discuss the issue when both people are more relaxed (preferably after a good dinner and some lovey dovey-ness).

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