Memsaab Gaia

I've gone from having absolutely no domestic help a month ago, to suddenly acquiring 3 new people to help me "manage" during the last few months of pregnancy. Mr. F and I feel like guests in our own house! I've become more conscious of my dupatta and reluctantly abandoned my baggy t-shirt riding up my tummy for a loose flowy kurta :-p. I even feel awkward sitting together in front of the tv!

At 8:00 am, there is absolute mayhem. Mr. F and I are trying to get ready for work amid knocks on the door asking what to make for breakfast, whether to iron the blue shirt or the white one and apologies for accidentally knocking over one of the souvenirs on the shelf.

When I come home from work, I'm besieged by complaints. Ali (chowkidar plus cook) vs. Shabana (dusting and ironing) and Maryam Maasi (cleaning lady) pointing fingers and having hurt feelings all around... *sigh*

Pawnay 14 August

If you haven't already, go watch this play! Subtle humor woven into a serious take on modern-day Pakistan... Anwar Maqsood does it again!

Take your parents and grandparents along if they're into plays :)

Karachi Literature Festival 2012

Kudos to Ameena Saiyid for successfully organizing this event for the third year running!

KLF gives Karachiites something to look forward to; a much needed intellectual platform where writers and artists can come together to connect in a safe, open environment. And the best part? It's free and open to all (all ages, genders and socioeconomic classes are welcome although the festival was dominated by the elite aunties in their winter shawls, sarees and designer sunglasses :-P).

I missed William Dalrymple, acclaimed author of White Mughals and The Last Mughal but I managed to sit in Dr. Pervez Hoodbhoy's talk which was both edifying and witty...

I'd also like to share that I got 2 rejections... one from Stanford and one from Yale :'(

Guess it's not meant to be but I hope Allah Mian shows me the light soon... I really want to get back to academics (safe option) or do something amazing (not too safe) soon Inshalah.

It's Cold and I've Nowhere to Sleep

She calls out to the man on the street

'Sir, can you help me ?'

'It's cold, and I've nowhere to sleep.

Is there somewhere you can tell me ?'

He walks on, doesn't look back,

He pretends he can't hear her

Starts to whistle as he crosses the street

Seems embarrased to be there.

Oh think twice,

It's another day for you and me in paradise

Oh think twice, it's just another day for you,

You and me in paradise

She calls out to the man on the street

He can see she's been crying

She's got blisters on the soles of her feet

She can't walk, but she's trying

Oh think twice .....

Oh Lord, is there nothing more anybody can do

Oh Lord, there must be something you can say

You can tell from the lines on her face you can see that she's been there

Probably been moved on from every place 'cos she didn't fit in there

Oh think twice .....

PIA - Awful People to Fly With

So I'm back in Karachi and in office... I always find it difficult to get out of holiday mode :-p.

So, PIA screwed me over yet again!! I was supposed to leave for Karachi on the 11:00 am flight from Lahore, except, a smaller plane showed up (an Airbus instead of a Boeing 777) and 50 passengers didn't get on the plane... I went back home after having said goodbye and hugged and kissed all my female relatives in Lahore and given candy to the kids :-p... embarrassing!

Mr. F made frantic phone calls to his friends in the airline industry and some kind-hearted and resourceful soul put me on the 10pm flight to Karachi. I'd bought Cinnabon the night before as a present for my sister and they went bad :(

Now I'm one of those who looks forward to airline food :-p... It's a way to distract myself and chase boredom so I'll normally eat whatever is in the little plastic tray... This time there was a sandwich and a slice of cake (gone are the days when they would serve us biryani and a greasy curry and the famous rock-hard pia bun with butter :( ). I ate the sandwich and have been paying for my greed since Sunday in the form of numerous trips to the bathroom and acute nausea... ugh!

Lahore Again!

Karachi closed down on Thursday after some psycho politician made some really antagonistic remarks about the Mohajir community...

I was expecting a mini-civil-war to break out or a situation akin to what happened when Benazir was shot in 2007, but the MQM leader "saved the day" and told the protesters to go back to their homes... Peace resumed.

I had a flight that evening and couldn't make it to the airport on time... after a series of delays, I finally (finally!) made it to Lahore on Friday evening... Lahore was beautiful! lush green and tranquil after the the chaos that is Karachi. Went to Yum (:P), it's a Chinese/Thai restaurant in Gulberg but Karachi's Fuschia is way better... Also tried English Tea House which is more "English" than the English themselves... They have pictures of the Queen prominently displayed on the walls and waitresses wearing frocks :p...

Mom-in-law dearest asked me no less than 8 times over a period of 2 hours when I'm going to have a baby (preferably a boy) because the last three grandchildren have all been girls... *sigh*

Fun Things to do in Karachi

I'm a Karachiite born and bred. I love the fast-paced city life, the traffic, the chaos, the mishmash of people and cultures but sometimes, I yearn for my life abroad. The peace, the security, the independence, the opportunity to travel and explore...

This month, I plan to be a tourist in my city and here's my list of touristy things to do:

- Visit the Mohatta Palace Museum (been meaning to do this for ages!)

- Walk around the Benazir Bhutto Park

- Go to Frere Hall (I went to see Sadeqain's horses in 8th grade; haven't been back since)

- Slide down the marble slides in Hill Park (haven't done that in 18 years!)

- Visit Mumtaz Mahal at Karachi Zoo (FYI: this is a woman with a wolf's body... enough to give you nightmares if you're around 5 and have a moderately active imagination. My dad used to take me as a kid and she'd ask for bakhsheesh... creepy!)

- Drink Pakola (it's been a while :))

- Shop at Empress Market (never been)

- Visit the Somiani Caves

Cricket Fever

has claimed Pakistan and I have to say... it's highly contagious. This morning, I went to the PSO gas station to fill up the car and Dil, Dil Pakistan was blaring :)

After a really really really long time, I'm seeing happy, excited faces and a whole lot of green. I love Shahid Afridi for his comment, "We're going to play a game, not fight a war..." and that's how it should be. My facebook newsfeed is all about the upcoming India Pakistan cricket semi-final in Mohali... with a lot of friendly/caustic banter about Munni and Sheila

Here's to a victory for Pakistan (inshalah) and a safe and peaceful match tomorrow :)

On Filipino Maids in Pakistan

I was chatting with one of my colleagues today when the conversation turned to Filipino maids... My colleague NK has twins, a boy and a girl and she works full-time, hence she needs child care at home and someone to pick and drop the kids from school.

So, I ask her, why not just hire a Pakistani maid? Because, NK replies, Filipino maids speak fluent English, are highly educated (her's worked in a bank in the Philippines) and brush their teeth three times a day... Plus, they won't run away or abandon you, they have fixed vacation and wages and they're clean. Also, they have no distractions since they're away from their own family and friends.

NK, being a warm-hearted lady allows her maid to go to Sunday Bazaar on Sundays. She makes it a point to hug her and treat her like one of the family and her kids look up to the maid as an older sister. She gets paid $300/month, to look after NK's kids while her own children are looked after by their grandmother in the Philippines... And she gets to visit once every 2 years.

Pakistani society is full of contradictions :|)

The Great Dinner-Party Weekend

It has finally happened:

Gaia = domestic goddess

Although it felt a little creepy stepping into my mom's shoes, it was actually a fun experience :). We had guests over for dinner on Saturday and again on Sunday with a completely different menu each evening.

Saturday was Thai food (spring rolls, green curry, red curry, fried fish and seafood cutlets with ice cream and brownie for dessert). 100% home-made (ok, ok so the ice cream was store-bought). But, Alhamdulilah, everything turned out great...

Sunday was desi food (chanay, mutton karahi, biryani and kofta with orange trifle and raspberry tart)... Food was ok... biryani rice turned out rather mushy and I guess I'm just not that big a fan of desi cuisine to begin with plus, all the meat makes me emo :-P

Mr. F and I will now be eating left-overs for the next three days

Garmi! Yayyy!

http://www.google.com.pk/#sclient=psy&hl=en&q=weather+in+lahore&aq=f&aqi=&aql=&oq=&gs_rfai=&fp=7a5841b160e1a01c

http://www.google.com.pk/search?hl=en&q=weather+in+karachi&btnG=Search

Back in Karachi after a 4-day trip to Lahore! Warmth flooding in... sigh :-)

Lahore was cold! Around 8 degrees C during the day with no heating! Humidity was so high that the socks I'd washed and hung outside to dry on Saturday morning were still sopping wet on Tuesday...

Most of my days were spent wrapped up in a shawl, wearing multiple socks and sweaters (borrowed from my dear sister-in-law and bhabis), clutching tissues to block my sniffly pink runny nose. A lonely gas heater in a large house with concrete walls is rather ineffective in the face of extreme weather... :-P

And why was I not adequately prepared? Having braved winters in New Jersey and London I had the necessary equipment (wool coat, down jacket, scarves, gloves, hats... the works) but Mr. F said I wouldn't need much for four days and he didn't want to wait in line for the luggage so poor poor Gaia showed up in chappals and shalwar kameez and a cotton-knit sweater :-(

Lesson unlearned: place complete trust in husband

In the end, I resorted to cooking halwa as an excuse to stay in front of the stove...

Iraday jin kay pukhta hon, nazr jin ki khuda per ho

Our CEO's in London and so, everyone's been coming in to work late and leaving at 5:30 pm on the dot :-P. It's true, when the cat's away... lol.

Today, I went to meet Mr. N at PSO house. We're looking into jatropha cultivation and we'd basically gone to get some advice concerning our business model... It would be great if Pakistan could become the next Jatropha nation, the plant is sturdy, grows on marginal land and perhaps most importantly, it doesn't compete with other food crops. It's sad that our Government's so slow to take on new initiatives. Pakistan also missed the CER boat while China and India have made millions :-(. Lesson learnt: when opportunity knocks, you need to be ready to take advantage of it...

On a positive note, the new Atrium cinemas are open! Mr. F took me to a special screening of Tees Maar Khan thanks to his friend who got us free passes. They're also offering Pakistan's first 3-D cinema experience (will be screening Avatar). Do check it out!

Aunty Party

Yesterday, Mr. F and I attended a company dinner at our CEO's house. I was there as "the spouse" :-p

It so happens, whenever I plan ahead for an event (outfit, make-up, hair, jewelry etc.), everything that can possibly go wrong, does. There was no electricity, so I ended up having to go to my parents' house to iron my clothes, didn't have time to dry my sopping wet hair and thanks to violence in the city, the bank closed early so I couldn't get my jewelry :-(

Still, we managed to be there on time. Mr. F sat in the drawing room with the men while I was escorted to the ladies' section... I was easily the youngest person there, everyone else was an aunty with kids in college; some even had grandchildren! They were all sophisticated aunties though... clad in elegant saris and beautiful jewelry :)

After indulging in polite small talk, the aunty I was sitting next to drawled:

"Beta, it's hot today isn't it?"

Gaia: nods in agreement, "Jee, it's very still outside... there's no wind"

Aunty 1: "Thank God, I thought my hormones were acting up again... you know? I thought I was getting hot flashes..."

Gaia: :O :oO

The conversation revolved around kids, family, pampers, college admissions, the moral degradation of society, maasis and cooks and the merits of Nixor vs. KGS vs. CAS...

I feel old!

Only in Pakistan

http://www.dawn.com/wps/wcm/connect/dawn-content-library/dawn/news/pakistan/provinces/03-two-brides-in-two-days-for-one-lucky-man-ss-08

Whirlwind Weekend

On Friday evening, Mr. F and I left work at 5:30 pm to catch the 7 pm flight to Lahore... Luckily for us, there was minimal traffic after the attack on the politician, so we made it to the check-in counter in good time. Landed in Lahore at 8:45 pm, arrived at the family home at 9 and got ready in 20 minutes for Mr. F's friend's Mehndi (complete with heavy eye-makeup and bling jewelry!).

Next morning, I made kheer and zarda... my initiation into household duties. FYI, I don't even like zarda and my mom's never made it, so I wasn't quite sure what "good" zarda was supposed to taste like. Luckily, I'd practiced in advance and my jithanis helped me out, so both the dishes turned out ok (thank you google :-)).

On Sunday morning, Mr. F and I drove to Islamabad for his friend's afternoon Barat. We left at 9:00 am and drove non-stop on GT Road. GT Road or Grand Trunk Road is one of South Asia's oldest roads and connects all the major cities in India and Pakistan. It was built by Sher Shah Suri who designed it in a way that at no point during the drive was the sun directly in our eyes. I wonder what Mrs. Sher Shah Suri was like...

We drove through Gujranwala and passed by factories, fields and orchards... Gujranwala is a dirty little industrial town with an abundance of bananas and donkeys. The rice fields looked beautiful and orange trees were blossoming... lovely!

We reached the hotel at 2:00 pm only to learn that the groom was stuck at a toll gate! So Mr. F and I waited in the hotel lobby for 30 mins until the barat finally walked in. The wedding was segregated, so I sat by myself trying to look busy and then called a couple of friends to catch up... Sadly, none of them answered so I continued talking on the phone, having a pretend conversation :-( (yes, I know it sounds pathetic but that was my only resort in a roomful of aunties speaking a language I don't understand).

Next morning, I had my US visa interview. The officer asked me if I "was putting my education to good use" and that was it! She didn't look at any of my documents! Hopefully, inshalah I'll get it soon... Mr. F got me pizza from Rahat bakery and then we drove back to Lahore, this time on the National Highway listening to bollywood soundtracks :p. Later that evening, I boarded a flight to Karachi, Mr. F hopped on a plane to Colombo and so ended my eventful weekend...

Lahori Eid

I spent my first Eid in Lahore... Mr. F was super excited and I guess the excitement was contagious :) We landed at 4:45pm but the bijli went and the conveyor belt stopped running so we had to wait a whole hour for our luggage to arrive!

By the time we got home, it was time for iftar so we sat down to break fast with the khandaan (Mashalah, Mr. F has 8 siblings... with wives and kids in tow it's quite a full house). When in Lahore, I'm Gaia chachi (chachi = father's younger brother's wife). As one of my nieces informed me, I'm still quite "new" coz I live in Karachi and we haven't really spent a lot of time together yet... I'll become purani (old) when Mr. F's younger brother gets married and his wife moves in :p.

I'm really not used to kids... when I was little and guests used to come over, I'd hide behind the door so I wouldn't have to meet them :S. My nieces and nephews are quite the opposite and scramble to sit in my lap and ask for hugs and kisses and candy... lol.

On Eid day, all the men dressed up in white boski shalwar kameez and went for namaz (Mr. F looked handsome :))... Meanwhile, I got dressed and went to say salam to mommy-in-law but I was told to go and change since I was looking too "simple". I went and put on lots of gold jewelry, 2 sets of bangles, red lipstick and my bling jora... Also straightened my hair and got a "puff"... I think I looked more Punjabi than Punjabis themselves... Mr. F was rather amused to see his usually somber wife looking like a heroine from some Punjabi movie... He said I needed to put on a few kilos to look the part :P

After a breakfast of murgh-cholay and sheer khorma, Mr. F took me a-visiting... I met quite a diverse selection of Lahoris... mostly though, the ladies talked about clothes and make-up and babies while aunties hastened to give me advice on how to manage the house and the husband. Now that I'm married, I get to sit at the married aunty table (when did that happen :0).

I had gelato at Cosa Nostra Pizzeria, fries at World Fashion Cafe, lunch at Hardees and dinner at Fujiyama (the one in Lahore is wayyyyy better than Karachi's Avari) and yes, I probably put on a couple of pounds :p

If I were to move to Lahore, I think I'd turn into a mem-sahib; eat all day and go to Uzma's and C'est la Vie on weekends... oh and pop mundas :p

Mr. F got me a desktop frame with a picture of himself for my cubicle :P. My boss is grinning from ear to ear (he thinks we should indulge in PDAs at work... heh).

I am now the office "bhabi" (ewwww, I know!). Although I should gracefully accept the fact, it does bother me that my identity is now derived from my husband's... I am now Mrs. F and no longer Ms. Gaia :-S

Inshallah it'll be our two-month anniversary today :) Problem is, I still don't feel married!! It's more like having a boyfriend/roommate... I asked Mr. F and he said it sounds cooler to say, I'm his girlfriend (as opposed to wife :p...)

Yesterday, I was indulging in a bout of nostalgia, remembering a time when the 6th of September was celebrated as a holiday and my brother and I would watch the parade on tv. Sadly, Pakistanis have precious little to celebrate these days...

This Eid, let us resolve

to send what we can

in the form of eidi to those

who are truly in need of it

Tragedy

The Air Blue crash, floods, bomb blasts... Dear God, please grant us respite, I don't think we can take much more of this...

Ameen

Waisay, it seems like everyone I know is getting married this year... 4 close friends, a very dear family friend and another colleague from work... I'll get to wear all my joras :)

Work's been crazy busy but our feasibility study is FINALLY FINISHED!! Hurrah! Stayed at work past midnight on the final day but of course, dear husband was right there with me so it was "perfectly alright"... The colleagues treat me with more respect now even though most of them are older than me.

Eid this year will inshallah be in Lahore... So, how do Lahoris celebrate Eid?

Random funny story from my last trip to Lahore:

Mr. F's family has a custom. When a new bride enters the husband's home for the first time, the husband is given a black pigeon and the wife get a white dove. Mr. F went first and released his pigeon. It fluttered, flapped its wings and flew up into a tree. Then, I released mine and it flew up into the same tree... I think it symbolizes wedded harmony or something along those lines but I'm not quite sure :S

Continuing with the train of thought sparked by a comment on my last post, I'll try to make sense of what I'm doing right now. Yes, inshallah I still plan to go for a Masters... perhaps even a Phd and I definitely want to do something meaningful with my life (inshalah). And thankfully, Mr. F is very supportive (so far :p).

I just need to figure out a way to balance my responsibilities toward my new family without losing sight of my own goals.

Following is a list of donation links, relief resources, organizations and individuals working to support flood victims of Pakistan. This data has been gathered from the media and other public sources.

Besides sending cash through below mentioned charity organizations, we can support by providing following commodities.

* Clothing: Clothes of various sizes, Beddings, Shoes

* Utensils: Jerricans (large plastic cans that hold 20 liters of water or other liquids), Crockery, Buckets

* Toiletries: Tissues, Soaps, Dettol (antibacterial cleaners), Towels

* Food: Rice, Sugar, Flour (Atta), Onions, Potatoes, Cooking oil, Tea, Milk (tetra packs or powder), Safe drinking water, Cooked Food

Medicines:

1. Water purification tablets.

2. Life saving drugs.

3. Vaccines for malaria, cholera, typhoid, influenza.

4. Pain killers including strong ones like morphine derivatives, tremadol, pethadine, kinz .

5. Antibiotics e.g. tetnus, amoxil, gentamycin.

6. IV cannulas

7. IV Drip sets

8. IV drips: normal saline, ringerlactate

9. Local anesthetics (injections)

10. Cotton bandages, cotton.

11. Surgical instruments: e.g needle holders, forceps, tweezers.

12. Suturing materials, Skin staples.

Charity Organizations in Pakistan:

Al-Khidmat Foundation:

Donate here: http://www.facebook.com/l/13074q-JdsREV0A4VOrdx0DGvuA;al-khidmatfoundation.org/donate-here.php

Edhi Foundation: Donate here: http://www.facebook.com/l/13074d4ovhGTezOoVXkhEhdPm6A;www.edhifoundation.com/contact.asp

SUNGI:

Donate here: http://www.facebook.com/l/13074JRL1_bZtEw-FDNhlp2MkVQ;sungi.org/emergency_donations_contact_information.html

Pakistan Red Crescent Society:

PRCS has offices in Islamabad, Lahore, Karachi, Peshawar, Quetta and Muzaffarabad. Please see: http://www.facebook.com/l/1307431uOA3Hno2HCPJyb2aAWEQ;www.prcs.org.pk/help.asp

Pakistani Youth: Please see:http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=140364565986483&ref=mf

An independent group of students:

see: http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=147776388569606&ref=nf

The Volunteers/ Voice of the Civil Society:

VOTCS with the help of our Pak Army jawans will be sending Provisions to the affectees. VOTCS is now a registered (No. DSW 3369-K) welfare organization in Pakistan, and is operating as a Non-Profit, Public Charity in the North America, Inc. - 501(C)(3) Organization(Tax Exempted)

HABIB BANK LIMITED ACCOUNT NO IS 1549-79001393-03

For more info call:

Hadia khan@03018245999

Sadia Haroon@03218251122

Irum Farooque@03002332142

International Charity Organizations:

Islamic Relief USA: Donate here: http://www.facebook.com/l/13074XFM-N1k5xYaFOQVY5qE63Q;www.islamicreliefusa.org/Page.aspx?pid=463

UNHCR: Donate here: http://www.facebook.com/l/13074qcQ6S0rviupd5zUDKKOPcQ;www.unhcr.org/emergency/pakistan/global_landing.html

United Nation’s World Food Programme: Donations are tax deductible for number of countries. Donate here: http://www.facebook.com/l/13074r4-Q6wj4FoqZlFC-5CqcLA;https://secure.my-websites.org/supporter/donatenow.do?n=gbss&dfdbid=1044253

Plan International ( Pakistan specific): http://www.facebook.com/l/13074r4-Q6wj4FoqZlFC-5CqcLA;https://secure.my-websites.org/supporter/donatenow.do?n=gbss&dfdbid=1044253